Wednesday, January 05, 2005
Back At Zero, Charged And Poised
I can’t get my body back into sync. Despite feeling fresh yesterday I woke today feeling extremely groggy and tired. Waves of disgust toward the Company washed over me as I contemplated coming in to my desk. It is so boring. So very, very boring. I wish I had gone to Art School.
Gail and I have discussed joining a gym as the local one has started doing a married couples special price. I need to get fit again and I reckon if the gym went well I would consider doing the Glasgow Half-Marathon again this year. I did it back in 2000 and ran for charity – raising over £600 for CancerBacup in the name of Ian Dury. 13.1 miles is very tough though so we shall see. The priority is getting fit and shedding a few pounds.
I’ve had time to think and there are two things I have been thinking about a lot while on my holidays.
1) I never did any writing or note taking from the 27th December to 2nd January as intended. This means I have not written for almost a month. In a perfect world I would have, but the reality is stepping away from life to touch base with everyone has been more important. I had reached a point where confusion was all that remained from a pretty stressful period and it was good to let go of everything. This has of course left a problem in that I am now only about 2 or 3 weeks ahead of my leading subscribers – not out with the contract range, but still needing attention. I don’t feel guilty – I needed to do it. 2005 brings much hope and I am determined to make this year work even more than the last.
2) A couple of people mentioned how much they like my diary and that they never knew I thought the way I do. There are two responses to this: first, this is not a diary. Only those thoughts and events I wish be made public are written here, and nothing is said here that I would not say to a crowd of my peers face to face. This is a journal of a man who hates his job but loves his art, and it is intended to be just that – a record of heartache, loss and hopefully some achievement at the end of it. It is also intended as a place for me to sound off on some social and environmental aspects that wander through my mind from time to time. Second, I am glad people think they know me better through reading this journal. I take this as a good thing as it reinforces the inner feeling I have always had of being misunderstood and underestimated.
I received my first royalty cheque this evening from Keep It Coming. $22.33 for Hunting Jack (£11.94), which equates to four pints of lager and a couple of cheese rolls from Clark’s Bar. Lovely.
Gail and I have discussed joining a gym as the local one has started doing a married couples special price. I need to get fit again and I reckon if the gym went well I would consider doing the Glasgow Half-Marathon again this year. I did it back in 2000 and ran for charity – raising over £600 for CancerBacup in the name of Ian Dury. 13.1 miles is very tough though so we shall see. The priority is getting fit and shedding a few pounds.
I’ve had time to think and there are two things I have been thinking about a lot while on my holidays.
1) I never did any writing or note taking from the 27th December to 2nd January as intended. This means I have not written for almost a month. In a perfect world I would have, but the reality is stepping away from life to touch base with everyone has been more important. I had reached a point where confusion was all that remained from a pretty stressful period and it was good to let go of everything. This has of course left a problem in that I am now only about 2 or 3 weeks ahead of my leading subscribers – not out with the contract range, but still needing attention. I don’t feel guilty – I needed to do it. 2005 brings much hope and I am determined to make this year work even more than the last.
2) A couple of people mentioned how much they like my diary and that they never knew I thought the way I do. There are two responses to this: first, this is not a diary. Only those thoughts and events I wish be made public are written here, and nothing is said here that I would not say to a crowd of my peers face to face. This is a journal of a man who hates his job but loves his art, and it is intended to be just that – a record of heartache, loss and hopefully some achievement at the end of it. It is also intended as a place for me to sound off on some social and environmental aspects that wander through my mind from time to time. Second, I am glad people think they know me better through reading this journal. I take this as a good thing as it reinforces the inner feeling I have always had of being misunderstood and underestimated.
I received my first royalty cheque this evening from Keep It Coming. $22.33 for Hunting Jack (£11.94), which equates to four pints of lager and a couple of cheese rolls from Clark’s Bar. Lovely.
Colin 11:25 pm