Wednesday, October 05, 2005
The Search For Perfection
On a normal night we might play nine frames, on a poor night seven or eight. Tonight we played six. After arriving just after seven o'clock as normal, we had only played two and a half frames three hours later. The big man certainly knows how to chit-chat.
It was good to be back though and to be honest I've missed the game over the last three weeks, although I have enjoyed being able to write on a Wednesday night. There has to be a balance though so I can't complain.
Confirmation of my letter being delivered to the Press Complaint's Commission arrived today - all four pages of it with supporting documentation. I'm hoping for a public, printed apology in The Times to every Scottish National person.
I managed some work on the Fringe Fantastic manuscript, inserting the new poems and tightening them up. I'm worried there isn't enough poems or that they aren't deep enough. I've tried to load them with imagery, innuendo, metaphor and emotion but I'm getting scared a lot of this will be missed. Many of the poems are a real departure from what people might expect from me, so in some ways this is a real risk. When Susan read the manuscript at our meeting last week she laughed and nodded to many of them but whether this was out of politeness once can never tell.
Maybe it's all just pre-publication nerves. I want the book to be perfect and as much, if not better, than the vision I had for it back in the summer. I want it to make people smile, laugh and feel what it is like to live in Edinburgh during the Festival month. It has to mean something, be a good representation of one person's experience - the poet's experience - me. The day this gets handed over after final proofing will be a nervous and exciting time.